Change; Just a Word?
This has not been my day... at. all. Let me start by saying, that I don't mind getting up early. I actually (in a weird sort of way) enjoy it. That isn't the case this morning...you see, I have a cold. I have one of those amazingly stuffy noses, that makes your head feel like someone's holding you underwater, just waiting for you to thrash around like "okay dirtbag, let me up for air"... But that isn't why my morning sucked....Actually, that's the furthest thing from my sucky start to the day.
I had a doctor appointment this morning. I am a type two diabetic. I have been for a few years now. Some days are harder than others, because of course there are lovely little complications...but overall, it's not a death sentence; So I deal! But back to the doctors...I got there a half hour early, because my sinus rinse didn't take half as long as I had intended it to...and sat patiently. I can be open and honest in the fact that I was taking better care of my sugar levels than I had been in the past, in 2016...but when my mother passed away, I simply didn't put forth the effort of caring about it... I let it go. I didn't monitor it three times a day like I should have been (at least)... I didn't take my insulin at every meal (like i should have been)...I wasn't logging/tracking what I was eating... So needless to say, my levels are crap right now. Absolute CRAP.
I knew this going into the appointment...because I can feel it. I feel my body going "Um, Princess, wtf do you think you're doing?" It's a scary feeling...but like when I was first diagnosed with this... I thought if I ignored it, maybe it would go away. Welllll let me just start by telling you, as I openly admit that to you, I'm shaking my head at myself. I can't believe that I let myself disrepect myself like this. It's not a matter of anything else... I just flat out disrespected myself. My body. My mental health. My future...SO, it's time for change.
I watched this video on Facebook the other day, that was so inspirational. It was a woman whom pushed herself to go to the gym every day for 100 days. She did a little vlog about her day to day, and at the end showed where she was as far as progress goes. This was inspirational to me for two reasons.
1. YOU GO GIRL. Making any sort of a commitment can be scary...especially when it comes to bettering yourself. She set a goal, and blew it out of the water.
2. Vlogging and putting something like that on the internet is super...scary! Letting it all out there for the world to see... showing your struggles and insecurities... Is terrifying...
And that's exactly why I've decided to start this. I'm doing things that scare me in 2017. So far, I've come to find that onions really aren't super terrible (as long as their cooked)...and that I actually don't mind going out to get dinner by myself... well that part is going to change. BUT you get what I'm saying. :) We're only six days into the new year, and I've already pushed two of my comfort zones...(There's a few more, but we won't go into that now).
I don't want to consider this a "vlog"...but rather a video diary (I know you're sitting there going "That's the same thing."...so hush, no judgy)...I hope to be able to look back in three months and be happy of where I am.
My next doctor appointment is on April 18th.. I hope to make great strides between now and then. I totes got this...
That's all I have for you right now!
Until next time! :)
I had a doctor appointment this morning. I am a type two diabetic. I have been for a few years now. Some days are harder than others, because of course there are lovely little complications...but overall, it's not a death sentence; So I deal! But back to the doctors...I got there a half hour early, because my sinus rinse didn't take half as long as I had intended it to...and sat patiently. I can be open and honest in the fact that I was taking better care of my sugar levels than I had been in the past, in 2016...but when my mother passed away, I simply didn't put forth the effort of caring about it... I let it go. I didn't monitor it three times a day like I should have been (at least)... I didn't take my insulin at every meal (like i should have been)...I wasn't logging/tracking what I was eating... So needless to say, my levels are crap right now. Absolute CRAP.
I knew this going into the appointment...because I can feel it. I feel my body going "Um, Princess, wtf do you think you're doing?" It's a scary feeling...but like when I was first diagnosed with this... I thought if I ignored it, maybe it would go away. Welllll let me just start by telling you, as I openly admit that to you, I'm shaking my head at myself. I can't believe that I let myself disrepect myself like this. It's not a matter of anything else... I just flat out disrespected myself. My body. My mental health. My future...SO, it's time for change.
I watched this video on Facebook the other day, that was so inspirational. It was a woman whom pushed herself to go to the gym every day for 100 days. She did a little vlog about her day to day, and at the end showed where she was as far as progress goes. This was inspirational to me for two reasons.
1. YOU GO GIRL. Making any sort of a commitment can be scary...especially when it comes to bettering yourself. She set a goal, and blew it out of the water.
2. Vlogging and putting something like that on the internet is super...scary! Letting it all out there for the world to see... showing your struggles and insecurities... Is terrifying...
And that's exactly why I've decided to start this. I'm doing things that scare me in 2017. So far, I've come to find that onions really aren't super terrible (as long as their cooked)...and that I actually don't mind going out to get dinner by myself... well that part is going to change. BUT you get what I'm saying. :) We're only six days into the new year, and I've already pushed two of my comfort zones...(There's a few more, but we won't go into that now).
I don't want to consider this a "vlog"...but rather a video diary (I know you're sitting there going "That's the same thing."...so hush, no judgy)...I hope to be able to look back in three months and be happy of where I am.
My next doctor appointment is on April 18th.. I hope to make great strides between now and then. I totes got this...
That's all I have for you right now!
Until next time! :)
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